Dear Ann Coulter, and everyone who thinks like her,
Let me educate you. Because I'm nice like that.
1. Not only is individual achievement applauded in soccer, but it's absolutely necessary. Ever heard of the golden boot? Probably not because you didn't actually research your article. You had an intense feeling about something, as has become the trend in America, and you blathered on without a whole lot of fact to back you up. 'MERICA!!
There is an amazing and very true-to-life function for each player. Just because you don't understand the function, it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Don't blame the entire sport for your ignorance.
2. "No serious sport is co-ed"....HAHAHAHAHAHA.
Have you seen the women's national team? Hope Solo was just arrested for BEATING UP HER FAMILY MEMBERS. This sport is NOT for sissies, period. Unlike football, there are no helmets, no padding and NO FAT PEOPLE. Just skin to skin, head to head, elbow to chest and so on contact. It is 45 minutes and another 45 minutes of CONSISTENT PLAY. So to say that because, as kids, in THIS country some places let girls and boys play together makes it a sissy sport? Cool, Ann, let's play. I would love to show you my, "sissy" side. Reeeeeeeeally I would. And better yet, I'd love to see some of the male members of my family playing some of the big mouth american guys who are bad mouthing this, "sissy sport". I would very much enjoy seeing that. Very, very much.
3. "GOALLESS, OH NO!" Yes, this is spot on, but again shows your lack of research and understanding, not a flaw in the sport. Unlike other games, soccer requires a little something called, "endurance". That means that you are CONSTANTLY being challenged on every front not that you have to deal with ADD. IF you understand the game, scoring becomes insanely exciting, yes....but ALMOST scoring? Seeing the ball travel on the pitch at high speeds? It's a thrill unlike any other because what the other team does to prevent the goal is often so filled with skill, or so strategic that you can't believe it actually happened. This is a game of strategy and opportunity. I can understand why, as a conservative, those concepts are foreign to you, since we have NONE of those things in our gov't right now, and that's a big part of why we keep FAILING! :) YEP, I SAID IT!!! Maybe if you guys watched a little more soccer, your campaigns and strategies wouldn't suck SO BAD!
4. "The prospect of either personal humiliation or major injury is required to count as a sport." Were you mentally incapacitated when you wrote this? A little too much of that strawberry margarita, maybe? Have you seen a real soccer game? Where people break bones, come off the pitch bleeding from all kinds of places, collide at high speeds, somehow jump the height of a grown man? Have you seen a cleat dig into someones skin, seen the result of that? Didn't think so.
"Sport: an activity involving physical exertion and skill in which an individual or team competes against another or others for entertainment." THAT is what a sport is. Again, much like with politics, and what you always blame Liberals for- you can't change the definition to only suit what YOU ARE TOLERANT OF! Hurts, doesn't it, when the shoe is on the other foot? Yea.
5. "Can't use your hands..." This is too stupid to even respond to fully, but I'll try. No, you can't use your hands. Which makes it far more difficult than other sports because there is a huge restriction on a much used part of the body. You are considering the position of your body at all times while going really fast and often paying attention to multiple people around you and not even looking at the ball at your feet. Remember, though....you CAN use your chest, your head, etc., etc. Go watch videos of goals of the greats and tell me that what their feet do are not some of the most skilled, impressive things you've ever seen, I'll call you a liar.
6. Let me clarify something for you. No one is PUSHING soccer on you. K? NO one. We like it and we get to enjoy it, so SHUT UP and leave well enough alone. Much like with TV, internet, etc. if you don't like it, CHANGE THE DAMN CHANNEL. Don't want to read about it (or, for that matter, support your own country? Who isn't patriotic now, blondie?) Fine, not my problem. I am not a person who fits into ANY of the categories you just mentioned, neither do about 60% of the soccer fans I know! Period. You have preconceived notions, none of which are true, and you're willing to bend the truth to fit your view. So, once again, based on your own stereotypes, you're taking an entire segment of your country and dividing them into these little categories that fit YOUR narrow narrative. Should I have expected anything different? I guess not. It's another reason that we keep losing stuff.
7. It's foreign? So am I. So are a whole lot of the conservatives and conservative libertarians in this country. Maybe none of us should vote, either. Thoughts? I wish you the best of luck continuing the ideals this country was founded on WITHOUT young people like me. Without a lot of the foreigners that happen to be soccer fans. And if you dumb idiots keep posting crap like this, you will CONTINUE to alienate people like me and force me even deeper into Libertarianism. You sure you want that? Yea, that's what I thought. FYI, the US Open Cup is one of the LONGEST RUNNING COMPETITIONS IN AMERICAN HISTORY!! LOOK AT THAT! FACTS!!! THEY SUCK, DON'T THEY!!
You can express your opinion, your dislike of the sport itself. But once you make it personal? You can go screw. I love this country a whole lot more than a lot of people who were BORN here. Take that and shove it.
8. Let me make a quick correction. See, soccer is all over the world, it's not, "European", that idea is, once again, showcasing your utter ignorance. It's one of the only things that has significantly diminished terror (READ ABOUT IT. READ ABOUT IT!) and brought down the amount of suicides, etc. all over the world. It's united countries, which is fantastic, period. But most importantly, it brings feelings of immense national pride. Have you ever seen the way that players and managers sing the national anthem before the game? There is nothing like it. It's amazing to see.
But yea, "Europe is EVILLLLLLL" so let's ignore all of those things.
9. Soccer is catching on, and there's really very little you, or people like you can do about it. You don't have to watch it, you don't have to like it. But don't be an asshole, otherwise, I will spend all of football season mocking fat men rolling around in spandex, and I will do it with joyful glee, as I've been wanting to for years.
I refrained, you see, because I understood something that seems to be a foreign concept to American Soccer Haters. You don't have to LIKE something for it to be acceptable. The world doesn't revolve around you or your view point. And very few people care, just like you couldn't care less what I think of football.
Love,
Ladysingin
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